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There is this guy at work who I really fancy but he has a girlfriend. On Saturday night I had a houseparty and we were playing truth or dare. I chose dare and one of my mates decided that me and this guy should be locked in a cupboard for 30 mins.Being drunk we both agreed. We ended up talking and I told him I was gay which he didnt know. He gave me a hug and I noticed his c$$k got hard the light was still on in the cupboard. He then went to kiss me but I pulled away as his girlf is my closest mate. Then he tells me he is bi and fancies me and is only going out with her to be close to me. My mind is now all over the place. Is he being a c%%k tease or does he really fancy me. What should I do? Any advice will be helpful.

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Go up to him, in private, and ask him while you're both sober. Make sure he can't run away on you like most guys would about something like that. But you must be up front. And if he was being honest while in the closet, (lol no pun intended) talk to him about it.

I second that! Really just ask him. But don't do the same as me crush and ask about it in he toilet of all places! Awkwardness garanteed! 

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Ok things have developed more since saturday. I asked him if he meant what he said he said yes he fancies me and is only with his girlf so he can be close to me. He wants to develop something with me but I dont want to lose my best mate who ive known since I was 4. Though I fancy the guy so much. We have spent lots of time together but nothing sexual just a hug and thats it. Im still not sure what to do. Advance things with this guy and lose my best mate or leave things or tell my best mate that her boyf is gay?

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In my opinion this needs the opposite of bros before hoes...

I'd never want to lose my best friend over someone, it would kill me... I'd much rather go through the emotional pain of getting over somebody I fancy and keeping best mate.

I think I would be going for the "tell best mate that bf is gay" but approaching it carefully.

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I'd just see how things work out. Take it slow. But I wouldn't go behind your friend's back. Maybe you can try to convince the guy to sit down with your friend and confess. I'd do this on a friday or so. That way the friend can proses stuff during the weekend and since it's a girl there's about to be tears and ****. They calm down after they thought about it. At least most girls do. Being fair gets you much further in relationships than keeping it all concealed and hidden. It'll come out anyway, sooner or later. 

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Thanks for the advice. Ive distanced myself from him which is hard as we work together. I spoke to him last night and said until he decides who and what he wants then I cant be his friend. I fancy him to much to not pounce on him and develop something with him. My best mate also knows something is wrong between me and him as its awkward between us now. I could just pounce on him? Lol.

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Oh crumbs! The fact he's your work colleague that's gotta be awkward anyhow. Maintaining professional conduct working together must be difficult for you mate.

What was his reaction to the phone call?

I respect that you don't wanna throw a spanner in the works concerning your best mate. Sometimes throwing caution to the wind is the most logical course of action. Telling her now rather than later will hurt less than if she found out for herself what the bf is like.

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Yeh i know but i cant tell her it will break her heart knowing her boyf wants me instead. What makes it even worse is I went out tonight with her n he turned up after work. I pulled and was going to take this guy I pulled home until he spoke to my best mates boyf who said to the guy i was going to take home hes mine hands off. I confronted him about it and he said well i want you to be mine. Again saying he is only with my best mate to be near me. So me being me and full off rage and horny pulls him to a dark corner and goes to snog him. He pulled away this time and said hid girlf might see. And went away. Now is he just being a c**k tease? Cos it now seems like he is playing me along he knows i fancy him knows i want him and is playing me for the fool iam.

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  • 4 years later...

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