This is from my Elliot Stories. The Ross Comes Out episode i posted in May ladt year. It's in the 18+ Stories. It's not quite exactly what happened to me but it's pretty darn close:- Realising that Elliot had come out to his parents, even though involuntarily, made me think seriously about coming out to mine. Until this point I hadn't really given it much consideration. I suppose I vaguely thought that some day soon I'd grow up a bit and start fancying girls. Realistically I was starting to accept that this wasn't going to happen. Had I ever had crush on a girl? Had I ever even understood why most lads find them irresistible? Answer's "No" to both of those questions. Had I been checking out guys since I was twelve? Had I been whacking off fantasising about cute skaters/saggers and what I'd like to do with them since about the same time? "Yes" to both of those questions. Did I love doing what Elliot and I did? You betcha! Yet the idea of coming out 'officially' terrified me. It underlined and somehow in my mind fixed my sexuality. And I knew, just knew, that my parents wouldn't take it well. Elliot's father's acceptance of Elliot's orientation had impressed me a great deal. A week after the incident in the wetroom I got a text from Elliot: Hi Ross - "you're gonna love this mate - my parents would like to invite you round for dinner. - arggghh! Sorry!! What you wanna do?" What did I want to do? Instinctively I wanted to run, or perhaps hide in my room and never come out at all. Then again, thinking more rationally, if Elliot's dad was bi and Elliot's mum had already seen me and Elliot making out big time and they still thought they'd invite me round for dinner what was the worst that could happen? Anyway, it seemed that Elliot could do with my support at a time like this. I texted back 'Ok let's do it'. Shortly afterwards Elliot phoned to say that he'd beaten then down to a bar'b'que which would, thank god, be less formal... ...I could now see where Elliot got his cool from. For parents his folks weren't so bad. Nothing much seemed to phase them. I even suspected that Elliot's dad thought it was kinda cool for Elliot to have a boyfriend. His mum - well, she kind of acted like she'd see it all before. Which being married to Elliot's dad of course, she probably had. The whole afternoon passed off without too much embarrassment - except perhaps when, well into the third bottle of wine, Elliot's mum suggested that she could "teach me a few tricks". Hum. My coming out was, and it didn't surprise me, much more traumatic. It started with me running out of petrol. I always ran my heap of a car with a near empty tank. Money was always tight and there was always better things to spend it on - clothes, alcohol, and other fun things. Coming home from Elliot's one afternoon the heap just stopped. Even as the car rolled on to the verge I had the feeling, even then, that this was the start of something big and bad. I walked the last couple of miles home and asked Dad if I could borrow his car to get petrol. He was a complete **** about it. Went on about responsibility and such like and said it would do me good if I had to walk with a jerry can to sort "the mess out". All I'd needed was a lift to the garage for god's sake. As you can imagine I was well pissed off about that. By the time I'd been to the garage, carried the petrol back to the car and got home, I was hot, sweaty and kinda bothered by the fact that some of Elliot's jizz had dried in my pubes. Couldn't wait to get in the bath when I got home. Then the hot water ran out. I was sitting in a bath with the water not quite covering my c**k and really pissed off about the argument with my dad. Why didn't my parents have a wetroom? Why did we have heating system that couldn't even heat up a bathful of water? It seemed that I spent my life doing what other people thought I should. I was fed up with it - I'd had enough! Coming out couldn't be that difficult. It had gone well for Elliot. There was no real reason why my parents would have any more difficulty. All our friends knew, so they would find out soon enough. I remember sitting that shallow bath and coming to a decision. I decided I was going to tell them right away. I got out the bath and quickly got dried and dressed. I headed downstairs and I could feel my nerve beginning to fail me. I could feel tears beginning to well up. Mum was in the kitchen. As I walked in she instantly knew that there was something up. She turned to look at me "What's the matter love?" And that simple question was enough to tip me over the edge. My tears began up flow. "I need to tell you both something. Where's Dad?" "He's in the garage. Why what's wrong? Have you had a car accident? Have you hurt someone?" "I want to tell you both at the same time. Get Dad." My emotional state had got Mum into a flap. She dashed off to get my father. When they both returned, they both had concerned looks on their faces. "What's the matter? What is it lad?" my father asked. "Have you had a car accident?" "No, it's nothing to do with the bloody car." I sobbed. "It's... I mean... I think I'm gay..." I was cross with myself, firstly for the unexpected tears and also for that 'I think'. I hadn't meant to express any doubt or start a debate. I collapsed down on to the sofa and Mum came to sit next to me. She automatically reached up to stroke my hair to soothe me as though I'd just fallen off my tricycle and grazed me knees. My father stood in the middle of the room just looking at me not knowing what to do or say... The three of us, pretty much, stayed in those positions for the next two hours or so while I talked about my innermost feelings, my parents tried to understand, and attempted to console me and reassure me. Once I got over the trauma of getting the words out of my mouth - of telling them that 'I thought I was gay', I managed to calm down a bit and they were more understanding than I expected them to be. Well, that's not exactly right; they tried to understand. I think they really did, but they just didn't get it. My statement had come, for them completely out of the blue, and they had very limited experience of all things gay. It was outside anything they understood. After a while it felt like I was trying to console them, or perhaps negotiate with them. My father kept repeating that it was 'just a phase'. Somewhere he'd come across the idea that boys sometimes went through an adolescent homosexual phase. He kept clinging to the idea that I would grow out of it. In the end it was kinder (easier?) to leave them with some hope that I would turn out straight. But I wasn't adolescent and I knew exactly what I wanted. Elliot, aka 'that funny kid' of course came into the discussion with my mum asking was he my boyfriend. What should I say? Tell the truth? - 'He's so f*cking hot I've wanted him for two years before I got to know him - Every time I see him we rip each other's clothes off - screwing each other makes me so happy?' I left it at a pathetic "Kind of..." my dad the came out with the astonishing "Has he touched you?" Arrgh! They really had no idea! Why was I being so pathetic? Was I just being a wimp? Fact is I could see they were shocked. I could see they were confused. I could see that they were hurt and I didn't want to hurt them more. I could have been making declarations but they needed time to come to terms with my news. So I had played things down a little. 'I "think" I'm gay', 'He's "kind of" my boyfriend...' I calmed down, I dried my tears, the conversation slowed. Dad turned on the TV. Mum suggested I should have the day off work tomorrow. She even said she'd phone in sick for me. I was glad of that. Next day I slept in late. I was soon to leave them no doubt what Elliot meant to me...
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